Monday, June 27, 2011

...monday nugget and music

The only way to make sense out of change
is to plunge with it, move with it,
and join the dance.
                            -Alan Watts

i am completely and totally diggin this song...
love the harmonies.

happy monday all

Tuesday, June 21, 2011

...on your heart

my littlest little is sick...
she is miserable and sad and 
feels like she is missing out on all the fun 
her sister and friends are having.  

i have tried to entertain her...
be with her, cuddle with her, 
talk with her, console her.  
i asked her to climb up on the bed 
next to me today and draw in my sketch book 
(if she wanted)...
she pulled it out, sat for a moment, 
looked over at me and said...
"mom, i don't know what to draw, and i usually know."  i simply told her, 
"draw what is on your heart love..."

this was the result...

(sydnie 6/21/11)

when your child hurts, 
you hurt just as much if not more...
and if you could carry that pain 
and take it all on yourself....
you would.  

that is simply what a mother would do 
and it is what i would have drawn today....
it was exactly what was on my heart.

hope you are all in good health 
and enjoying your summer.


Monday, June 13, 2011

...some peace and monday music

("PEACE OUT" painting i finished last week)

                       -Jimi Hendrix

happy monday my friends.


Thursday, June 9, 2011

.....say whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat??

happy "wednesday" my friends!!  
i hope you are having a wonderful week... and 
unlike me... actually know that today is NOT
wednesday but is really thursday!!!

(little painting i did yesterday...think i may do this on a big canvas...)

I am working on this more and more...

seeking the real...

seeking the real in me
seeking the real in my day to day life
seeking the real in my marriage
seeking the real in my relationships
seeking the real in others
seeking the real in my creativity
seeking the real in conversations i have
seeking the real with my children and being a mama

so...what about you...



ps...i cannot thank all of you enough
who read my last blog post regarding
my son and all of the beautiful comments...
it made my heart smile GIANT!!!
thank YOU!

Monday, June 6, 2011

...proud, grateful, full up

Autism:  "Autism is a complex developmental disability that typically appears 
during the first three years of life and is the result of 
neurological disorder that affects the normal functionings
of the brain, impacting development in the areas of social interaction 
and communication skills.  
Both children and adults with autism show difficulties in 
verbal and non-verbal communication, 
social interactions, and leisure or play activities.

This is the definition given by the Autism Society of America.

I can relate to much of that definition...
however, I have been the witness to a child 
who has not let his diagnosis hold him back.  
And who has learned to rise above 
some of these "disabilities."
(and...I am FOREVER grateful to the teachers
and aides who have helped along the way)

On Friday, June 3, 2011 by sweet son Chandler 
graduated 8th grade in a class of well over 300 students. 
Watching him happily accept his diploma...
smiling, interacting with fellow classmates
 was beyond amazing for me.

The fact that he made honor roll...
was beyond amazing to me.

He was amongst many children who have gone to school
with him since he was 5 years old.  
This chapter closed for him that night as he 
will be going on to a high school where many of
these students won't be attending.  

He was able to express his sadness and gratitude...
which made my heart swell that he could
 so accurately depict these emotions he was experiencing.  
(THAT is a big deal for someone who is
diagnosed with autism)

I am not certain what part of that evening was
my favorite....
from putting his very first tie on him,
 to watching him receive his diploma, 
to seeing his great grandma
snuggle up on him full of love and pride.

I have never been one to like labels or putting
a box around things...

i think we all are simply who we are...

unique, beautiful,
wondrous souls...
each having our very own quirks,
our very own strengths, 
our very own weaknesses...

each of us defying odds, changing definitions...
setting examples.

my heart is full up with my beautiful boy's
accomplishments...i look forward to the next
chapter in his life...
the new challenges, the new victories...

the story continues.

thank you for listening.


Wednesday, June 1, 2011

say whaaaaaaaat wednesday???

i am sensing that something is in the air....
something many of us are struggling with.

i have had a few conversations with friends 
regarding these same topics and it certainly helps me 
to know that i am not alone in the 
feelings i have been experiencing on and off 
in my couple of years of blogging and creating
and facebooking...

the feelings of inadequacy.  
the feelings of "i'm not good enough".  
the feelings of "who do i think i am?"  
the feelings of "look at what she is doing...
why didn't i think of that?"  
the feelings of "how do i find balance to create and 
be a good mom and a good wife, etc...??
  the feelings of "why does the grass always seem to be 
greener on the other side?"  

the feelings of "what is really real in the blogosphere/online?"
and just "how real" should we get when we blog?

my friend Lara did a post today that really hit home for me.  
She touches on many of these subjects and 
I truly admire her view point on it.
loved this in particular...Lara said 

"The “not knowing we’re alone” part seems to come only when you seek it out, at least for me. I guess those people who crack open have always been a porch light and I flap like a moth around it to feel some sort of comfort know..these things take time."

So today i am asking all of you...

how do we focus on the fact that the grass 
isn't necessarily greener elsewhere...
but instead is greener where we water it?  

how do we stop comparing and start owning
 our authentic "good enough" selves???

how do we have the guts to show the ugly in our
lives too on our blogs...without sounding
like we want a pity party thrown in our honor??

i would love you to weigh in on this...
as it is something i believe we all can relate to.
thank you.